Tuesday, August 08, 2006

I hate monday mornings. Remember that old school essay where they ask you to write “If I were Prime Minister of India”? And we rant on about the usual better education, eliminating corruption yada yada. Well I would like to add one more thing to that - three day weekend.

But I am not Manmohan Singh, and I head to office, body half-willing, mind fully unwilling. I settle down in my cubicle and open my inbox. Reading all those forwards that would have piled up over the weekend should be good timepass. What the fcuk!! Inbox says zero mails!! I frantically click on the Send/Receive button over and over again with the hope that all the mails are blocked somewhere in the way and will come pouring down, flooding my inbox. Not to be. Maybe the company mail server is down. I check my other mail Ids. Yahoo ID has a mail from a nice bloke from Nigeria who wants me to help him transfer his dead uncle's $20m to some european bank and Gmail ID has a concerned lady named Daisy wanting to enlargen my umm... a particular organ. No forwards?! This is so not happening. I turn around to check what Venky is doing with so much enthu on a Monday morning. I should have guessed. Ever since he's got engaged, that SOB has been lost in his own world of Yahoo Messenger, chatting with his fiance. Why the hell should he enjoy on a Monday morning so much? I decide to pester him.

“Hey Venky...Is the mail server working? I didnt get any mails”

“Yeah its working fine, I got mails”, he responded lazily as he kept typing into the chat window.

“Hey come man, lets go have some coffee.. Come on man, give her some rest”

“Yaar actually we are discussing something important, you carry on man”

Important? Yeah I can see that with all those smooching smileys and hearts on the screen. Why the hell am I not engaged to some nice, pretty girl working in Infosys? I figure out this is not the best time to think about it. What I really need now is a strong coffee. None of the other guys are in yet, so I headed for the cafeteria alone.

“Coffee Machine Out of Order. We regret the Inconvienence. Thanks for your Patience – Management”

Could somebody please kill me? I head back to my seat. Now what? God! Its only 10 AM!! 8 more hours!! Ah.. Finally.
Damn! Its from offshore. Dont those guys have any homes to go to? Its 10:30 PM in India, for heavens sake!! Loosers!!!
“Hey Rahul, that patch fix that you sent is crashing on Win NT machines if you enter special characters in the Name field. Please fix it and send it asap since we have to update it to the FC3 team right now. We are doing night out here. So send it fast so that we can test and release it”

At this point I had had enough. I closed my eyes and sunk into the chair. Something started ringing. It was very annoying and was not stopping. The alarm sound got louder and I stretched across the table, still sleeping, to switch it off. Pratyush, my roomie is in the bathroom singing “Khoon Chala...”. Good, I can sleep for 10 more minutes.
Did someone just say early morning dreams come true?


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